سورة البقرة

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): Ila' is when a man says to his wife that he will not have intercourse with her. In this case, if the woman patiently endures in this manner, there is no problem; but if she refers her complaint to the Imam (peace be upon him), the Imam (peace be upon him) grants that man four months' respite and then tells him: "Either return to your marital life, or divorce your wife." Otherwise he will imprison him forever (sentence him to life imprisonment).

Imam Ali (peace be upon him): Ila' is when a man says to his wife: "By Allah! I am angry with you, and by Allah! I shall certainly do evil to you." Then he abandons her and does not approach her until four months pass. If four months pass [in this state], the man is obliged to pay the expiation for his oath and return to his wife, or divorce her.

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): Abu Basir said: I asked Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): What is ila'? He said: Ila' is when a man says to his wife: "By Allah! I will not have intercourse with you, such and such," or he says: "By Allah! I shall enrage you." Then he does not have intercourse with his wife for four months and holds back, and after that he returns to her ... And if he does not turn back from his oath and does not pay the expiation for his oath, he is compelled to divorce that woman. And no divorce takes place between the two, even if it be after the passing of four months, except in the case where the woman refers her complaint to the Imam (peace be upon him).

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him) said regarding the matter of ila': If a man performs ila' with his wife (swears an oath that he will not lie with her), he must not have intercourse with her; he must not approach her nor lie with her. [He] is not obliged to have intercourse for four months. After the four months have passed, if the woman does not object, the man is still not obliged to have intercourse; but if the woman demands her right after the four months, the matter is referred to the Imam (peace be upon him) for judgement, and the man is compelled either to return to his wife [after paying the expiation of his oath] and have intercourse with her, or to divorce her. And if he wishes to divorce her while she is menstruating, he must wait until she has become pure from her menstrual blood, and then, without having intercourse with her, divorce her in the presence of two just witnesses. After that, the man is the most entitled person to return to her until she has become pure from menstruation three times.

Imam Baqir (peace be upon him) and Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): If a man performs ila' with his wife (swears an oath not to have intercourse with his wife), he must not have intercourse with her; the woman cannot object for four months and has no right, and the man has not committed any sin by refraining from intercourse with his wife during those four months. If those four months pass and [still] the man does not have intercourse with his wife and the woman also does not object and is content, there is no compulsion on the man to have intercourse with his wife; but if the woman refers her matter [to the Imam], the man is compelled either to return to the woman [by paying the expiation of his oath], or [if she is menstruating at that time] to wait until she is pure from menstrual blood and then to divorce her; and until the woman has become pure from menstruation three times, that man is the most entitled of people to return to her. This is the ila' which Allah the Exalted has revealed in His Book, and it is the Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family).

Imam Rida (peace be upon him): The term of ila', after the woman and man come before the Islamic judge, is four months. If those four months pass, the man must either keep his wife or divorce her. Imsak (retention) means having intercourse.

Imam Ali (peace be upon him): The Imam (peace be upon him) detained Umar ibn Harith, who had sworn to keep away from his wife and four months had passed from this oath, and said: "Either pay the expiation of your oath and return to your wife, or divorce her." The Imam (peace be upon him) said: "If a man swears an oath to abandon intercourse with his wife, for four months no sin [nor objection] rests upon him, and if four months pass, he must either pay the expiation or divorce the woman. If his wife does not demand her right (the request for intercourse), nothing is upon the man and divorce does not take place. But this ruling (the necessity of paying the expiation and the man's intercourse with the woman or divorcing her) pertains to the time when the four-month period has ended and the woman demands her right. But if the woman does not insist on taking her right, [the man] has a choice between paying the expiation of the oath and returning to the woman, or divorcing the woman."

Imam Ali (peace be upon him): The Imam (peace be upon him) placed a man who had done ila' (oath-abstention) against his wife and had not returned to her after four months, into an enclosure he had built from reed-stalks, and said to him: "Either return to marital life with your wife, or divorce her; and if you choose neither, I will set these reeds on fire [so that you burn]."

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him) said concerning the ruling on a man who does ila' and refuses to divorce his wife: "Ali (peace be upon him) would place such a man in an enclosure of reeds and imprison him in it; he would give him neither food nor drink until [he was compelled to] divorce his wife."

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): [A man asked:] "What is the ruling on a man who does ila' against his wife after having had intercourse with her?" The Imam replied: If four months pass, [the matter] must be referred to the Imam (peace be upon him), even if it be after some time. If that man returns [pays the expiation for his oath and returns to his life], she is his wife, and there is no problem in his return.

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): If a man does ila' against his wife and four months pass and he does not return to her, that woman, by referring her matter to the Imam, is divorced from that man. After that, if the man wishes to return, he may return only after two [instances of] divorce; and if he wishes to divorce her, then by talaq ba'in (an irrevocable divorce, in which there is no further right of return and they separate from each other), that woman is separated from him.

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): Narrated from Abu Basir, the Imam (peace be upon him) said concerning the ruling on a man who has done ila' against his wife and four months have passed: His matter must be referred to the Imam (peace be upon him); if he wishes to divorce his wife, that woman must observe the waiting period ('idda) like divorced women; and if that man returns [and wishes to keep his wife], there is no problem in that.

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): The Imam (peace be upon him) said regarding the ruling on a man who has performed ila' against his wife and four months have passed: Their case must be referred to the Imam. If the man wishes to divorce the woman, she is separated from him and must observe the waiting period like a divorced woman; and if the man does not divorce her, he must break his oath and pay the expiation for breaking his oath and return to his wife.

Imam Jawad (peace be upon him): Muhammad ibn Sulayman said: I said to the Imam (peace be upon him): 'May I be your ransom! Why is it that the waiting period of a divorced woman is three menstrual cycles or three months, and the waiting period of a woman whose husband has died is four months and ten days?' He said: 'The waiting period of a divorced woman is three cycles of purity from menstruation, so that her womb may be clear of any child; and [regarding] the waiting period of a woman whose husband has died, Allah the Mighty and Majestic set a condition for women and a condition against them; in what He set as a condition for women, He did not place them under pressure, and in what He placed upon them, He did not disregard [them]. In ila', He set four months as a condition for women, when Allah the Mighty and Majestic says: لِلَّذِینَ یُؤْلُونَ مِنْ نِسائِهِمْ تَرَبُّصُ أَرْبَعَةِ أَشْهُر [For those who swear ila' against their wives is a waiting period of four months]. So Allah does not permit anyone more than four months in ila' [of abstaining from intimacy], because Allah the Exalted is aware of the utmost limit of women's patience in being apart from men. And what He placed upon women is that Allah commanded women that when their husbands die, they observe a waiting period of four months and ten days. So He took from the woman for the man at the time of his death that which He took from the man during his lifetime in his ila' for the woman. Allah the Exalted said: یَتَرَبَّصْنَ بِأَنْفُسِهِنَّ أَرْبَعَةَ أَشْهُرٍ وَ عَشْراً [They shall wait concerning themselves four months and ten days], and He did not mention the ten days of the waiting period except together with the four months, and He knew that the utmost limit of a woman's patience in abstaining from intimacy is four months. So from there, He made [a waiting period] obligatory upon women and [a waiting period] for them.'

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): Ifa' means that the man reconciles with his wife.

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): فَإِنْ فاؤُ فَإِنَّ اللهَ غَفُورٌ رَحِیمٌ [But if they return, then indeed Allah is Forgiving, Merciful] means: if they return.

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): That is, they return from the ila' [oath they had sworn to abstain from intimacy with their wives] and live with them.

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): If he returns from his decision — that is, he reconciles with his wife — [the matter is complete].

Imam Sadiq (peace be upon him): If the man [after ila'] utters a word or does an act that is a sign of his return, he has performed ifa' (breaking this oath and paying its expiation). Allah says: فَإِنْ فَآؤُوا فَإِنَّ اللّهَ غَفُورٌ رَحِیمٌ [Then if they return, indeed Allah is Forgiving, Merciful] — that is, if they return.